Yes, I'm Going To be Great. But First, I Want To Sleep.
on grind culture and making a case for lazy days.
Dear reader,
I hope this meets you well.
This week, I’m thinking about grind culture; the mentality that you need to keep going, all gas no breaks.
You know how it goes: Sleep five hours, spend 14 hours learning and working, listen to podcasts while exercising, eat on the go, read while eating, UTILISE EVERY SECOND OF EVERY SINGLE DAY.
No, don’t hang out with friends- that’s a waste of time, don’t stay idle, if you’re thinking, it should be only thoughts on success and leadership and blah blah blah.
I’m sorry, but I just want to sleep. I don’t subscribe to this constantly hustle mentality at all (maybe that’s why I’m not the next Bill Gates).
Grind culture can be so harmful in many ways: mentally, physically, emotionally- every single aspect of a person’s life. Young adults are out here battling high blood pressure, tremors, depression, loneliness- the list goes on.
In May, I had a health scare and had to undergo a series of tests. The results were the same thing my mother has been telling me for free for the last four years: you need to eat well, sleep eight hours and exercise.
Grind culture makes you feel like if you sit to watch a 2-hour movie instead of reading about the economic impact of the pandemic on Uruguay, then your life is over. See, just forget about success!
And I understand the appeal. At the end of this suffering for a just keep working, something would click number of years is the promise of success.
Example of grind culture speak: I challenge you to work everyday, no breaks for the next 10 months and watch your life change.
Followed by a plethora of testimonies from people about the different ways they broke their bodies and minds: but hey, look it paid off! All I had to give in exchange was my health!
Don’t get me wrong. I’m a firm believer in hard work and excellence. I think to attain a certain goal, you would have to put in somewhat backbreaking work, cut down the excuses and give up certain luxuries. Growth, after all, is uncomfortable. However, I’m also a firm believer in balance.
Yes, do good work, solid work, but also create time for rest. Schedule a day in your calendar where the agenda is nothing.
I am as selfish about my time working as I am about my rest time. No, I’m sorry I can’t take a look at that document, because I would be watching Netflix. No, I can’t come to that conference, I would be lying down in my room, giving myself space to think of important subjects like: does locking a locker make me a locker? Am I a walking key?
Every day, I wake up, I show up, I try to try, I put in the work. Every day, except Sunday. That’s me time. That’s family time and gossip time and k drama time and newsletter time and drawing abstract stuff time and whatever else my mind is curious about time.
I’ll admit, sometimes overindulgence in rest can lead to the slippery slope of laziness/ getting too comfortable (is this, particularly a bad thing?), so the key here is finding a balance.
I hope as you navigate life and your super Marios, you are also able to rest/play as hard as you work. I hope you take the time to carve healthy and sustainable ways to exist in this rat race that’s capitalism.
Away from my musings, I read pretty interesting stuff this week, so let’s unpack them:
Maybe your life isn’t going as bad as you think it is. Sometimes, we’re our biggest critics.
What stood out for me about this article was his absolute conviction that he was going to achieve everything he set out to achieve.
Love and the various forms it can take is something that would always fascinate me. I am of the opinion that two people can love each other for a short time, but then walk in opposite directions. True love doesn’t always equate to permanence.
This was a sombre, sharp and reflection-worthy read about what to do when your parents are dying. The kind that forces you to sit with yourself for a while.
This article is a portal to other articles, videos etc. on grind culture and how it affects women in particular.
Writing Prompt
If you’re new to this letter, you should check here for how the Writing Prompt segment works.
The writing prompt for this week is:
Write a letter to your future self.
Send in your submission here or publish it on your Medium account and send me the link!
What this newsletter is:
Reading: Vagabonds, by Eloghosa Osunde
That’s it for this week.
With love,
Titi.
P.S: I’m proud of you and rooting for you.
Love this so much, as usual! It's so sad how we usually have to reach or come close to the point of breakdown before we realise how important (and even productive) rest is in our lives. We all need sabbaths too. Thank you for this!
P.S: This weeks writing prompt reminds me of a website: https://www.futureme.org where you can write a letter to your future self and receive it in your email whenever you want to. (Just an idea for anyone who wants to do this but is skeptical about sharing it publicly.)
Finally someone can relate to how I exactly feel..... Definitely loving this.